Tugging of the Heart.

I stand to wonder why? Why she tugs my heart, Why people see outward beauty but I only see the beauty within, Her Love for people, Her love for her friends and family only reflect the pureness of her heart. I wish......Yea I wish I could give her the world, give her my everything, but most importantly I wish I could share the one thing that's most important to me, My love for my Lord, oh bitter sweet it would it be, oh how I dream you could see, What you mean to me! yes, what you mean to me. If only, if only you could see what I see darling, that you dont fulfill me but you complete me, what you've taught me about me is what first attracted me to you, You stole my heart so quickly, well I could probably sue. and if I lost you, i'd be fine because in my heart you'll always be mine. What I cherish most about you, is how your heart is so honest and true. The world sees you as a pretty face, but honey that's the last thing that makes my heart race. Because your beauty only accents what you are inside, flawless and gorgeous just like a dime. and lastly and I wont say it so hastily, Your love for the lord is what really amazed me, and as I pray for you each day, my heart grows like flowers in the month of may. Most call me crazy for thinking of you my fine lady, but i'd take a leap of faith for a love me, maybe? They say your out of my league and there's other fish in the sea, but I would only hope you would go for someone like me.

Think....think....think some more

It's crazy to think that I'm in my career, that every morning I wake up knowing God has me exactly where He wants me and that my job is my physical act of worship that my love for Him is my spiritual act of worship and that I get to share his love everyday with those He puts in my path. Every morning is a journey to a new night and I hope in the middle I bring Glory to Him who deserves it. Lately Gods been changing my heart about certain things like the type of girl He has created me to have. My desire, the desire He has put in my heart is to marry a woman who's attention I have to fight for because she's so in love with my Creator, someone who I could do ministry with and encourage me to sacrifice submit and surrender to my Lord everyday! I hope to see Christ in her every time I lay eyes on her. To know she's a gift and to treasure her as so, to know she would let me put her second because I am second and to serve her like I serve Him. My desires are His. His love is a vast ocean.

Pain now but Joy comes in the morning.

Words. Words. Words. Why is this the only way we can express ourselves. Why is it when I feel pain in my heart and sorrow in my soul that all I can say is wow. I wish I could express myself better than that. I wish that when it hurt that I could help others understand my pain. Your probably trying to figure out what happened huh? Tonight I had a really good conversation with one of my YoungLife kids and after an hour of talking in my car, my heart was shattered. I was spiritually in pain and there was nothing I could do about it. My soul long to help him and free him of the emotional abuse he was being subjected to. His pain was now my pain and I knew that I was on a spiritual battle now. A battle that God has already won! I know that God is in control and that there is nothing out there that cant be healed by my Lord. Leadership has really stretched me as a man and as a follower of Christ, But one thing remains that every night my heart breaks for the students for the kids that are abandoned broken and lost, For those that have to hear they are worthless and are bound by other peoples Words. But I know that this pain is the Fathers pain. The same pain He felt for us and came to Heal. I know now that He has called me to help those that are chained to be freed and I truly am honored that He has called someone like me to be a part of all of this. Lord Thank you. Because after this pain is healed I know there will be Joy in the morning.

New Beginnings

New year, new things right? I think this year I may take a different approach, Really just change how I come at things whether new challenges or missions I will wear a confidence of the Lord and take the leap of faith into the next journey of Life, The past year wasn't the best but God did show up and do some radical things in My life and that is definitely a sign that I am on somewhat the right path so Not a new start but New beginnings and I'm so excited to see the things that happen in ministry and in life. No more kicking up the feet but really getting up and running the race the Good race in which God has called us to! Another thing I've been struggling with is Time....yes......time we have such little time and no where near enough to get the stuff we need to get done. One  thing in particular that stands out is time with my own family and Friends, Growing up I really didn't have a lot of friends but now God has blessed me with almost to many and its super hard to manage my time with all of them and often time some are left and out which hurts my relationship with them. But I do know they are in my life for a reason and will forever cherish those Friendships. I'm gonna try to really push to right more than once a week but again I'm not a writer at all so bare with me friends.

The Fire

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Well looks like 2011 is gone and 2012 is right around the corner, this year has been full of blessings,tears,joy,friendships,laughter and way more then what I expected. What im looking forward to the upcoming year is for God to really just reignite a new fire and new passion in my heart for what I enjoy doing the most and that is sharing my life and my all for students, just recently I was listening to this song by JJ Heller and in the song she says the fire doesn't leave anything that isn't of worth. Wow may the God of the universe set our lives on fire and remove all that isn't of worth and spark a new excitement on our lives and that all that we do we may do it with every fiber of our being! Also this past Sunday pastor spoke on pride and humility I as a person wouldn't say i'm the most humble person out there but one thing I strive for and killing the pride in my life because honestly its one thing I cant stand about people, and I wish there was more people out there that would just lay down their own personal interest for others. Nothing brings me more joy then making someone else smile or make some else really feel like they belong to something. So for now I guess ill set this year on fire and just pull out those things that have made me stronger wiser and a better person and take those things with me into 2012 and Hopefully they will be useful tools for a great year!

His Hands

My Life in His hands. Recently it really has dawned on me how much God has done in my life just in this year alone! 2011 has been a year of Blessings, Friendships,Opportunities and Growth! I guess ill start with my first mission which was start up Young Life at Millennium High school....Well first WOW did God open the doors at Millennium not only do we have club on campus, we also have TWO school sponsors and Lunch table where we play music and hang out twice a week! We also have passes to get into sporting events for free and we have been averaging about 60-80 kids every week talk about God showing up! The first semester flew by and I couldn't feel more encouraged about the spring semester! Then God threw a curve ball at me early September when He pulled me out of my job at Macayos and put me into a full ministry position at Skyway Church can I get a AMEN! God has given me my Dream job at the age of 21! I couldn't be anymore blessed! this mission is requiring everything God has taught me in the last 4 year and trust me He is calling me to use it all! and the best part yet is that this time next year they want me to be the Senior Youth Pastor at Skyway church! I cant even put into words how grateful I am for all that He is doing and im ready for the journey ahead for the sacrificing and surrendering that's to come! Please pray for the ministry that God is doing in the west valley and of course Pray for the students that are more broken than ever before.

Holiday Pain

Yup..... Unforgettably its the holiday season and there's nothing I can do about it. The horrible Repeating Christmas music. The decorations and wait did I mention the horrible music... You can Call me a Grinch but I have my Reason to hate the Holidays. It is the Holidays when ive gone through the hardest times in my life and it seems as though it never fails to disappoint. As though the world is on the mission to make sure the holidays are anything but Festive. But each year I do what I cant to make the best out of it. This year hasnt been quite back yet... but we shall see. Lately in my life things have just been different a Good different and its hard to explain but all I can say is that God presence has been thick in my life and ive been enjoying every minute of it. I know that what ever God has in store for me for 2012 is beyond what ever I could possibly plan for my own life, but I know that it will be a year of tears,laughter, and of course sleepless nights. Id write more but currently my body just want to rest and well God did say Rest. So to make it up to you i will leave you with some leadership advise. As a Leader walk in Grace with your Kids, Be a father and a brother at the same time and know that as long as you Love them for who they are God presence will pour out of you like a Stream of living water. Night Love you all!